ROOFTOPS

I originally intended for Rooftops to live out its life as a poem. As time passed, whenever I would read it, I found myself singing it. The organic meter gave birth to an organic melody, which was yearning to be something greater than a poem. Not to understate the flow and beauty of metered poetry, but music adds another dimension, poetry in motion, I suppose. The song is about accepting love into your life and taking accountability for self- humiliation, and wanting to see a shift in bad behaviors. In order to accept love, it's important to relate to it, no matter in what form it appears. It is also important to understand that life is full of contradictions, be them owned by ourselves and thrown out onto others, or owned by others and thrown out onto ourselves. When I first met Glenn, I had just gone through a horrible detox, from all of the poison I had been putting into my body for the previous ten years.

For sure, I was not in a place to have a relationship, and I was not looking. We met casually, and were instantly inseparable. He had the perfect life, the perfect family, and not a worry in the world. We were very different people. Never had I been so confused! I knew I wanted to be with him, but I had already made promises to myself to take better care of “me,” and not worry about anything or anyone else. I had already lost the majority of my friendships; I was the only one of my posse that decided to get clean. The thought of getting close to someone, and being vulnerable, not to mention, taking a gamble on losing something else, was unbearable. This poem became my promise to myself, to let go and be vulnerable, take chances, and tell my story. The truth will set you free, and it did. Needless to say, I made the right decision in terms of being vulnerable. We have been together for over 11 years, and we are very happy. Life is all about taking chances. When you stop taking chances, you stop living. Beating yourself up for past mistakes will only lead to future disasters.

Note to self: Thank you!

Rooftops

There's a stairway to my attic
But it's really hard to get to
And if you manage to climb my stairs Be careful of the rafters,
They can really cut deep, they can really cut deep

There's a corner where the ceiling's really high In that corner, you will find me even higher
I'll be naked I'll be laughing
I'll be angry from the tire
From crawling through my rooftops
Searching for desire
But at the same time I love you
But I'm a little more than tired
From crawling through my rooftops
Searching for desire

Like you I have found nothing
But a lifeless form of nothing
Standing in a corner
Of a place that nearly killed me

I guess I'll say I'm sorry
For not telling you before
It’s so good for my body
Some things need restore

I'm sure someday you'll join me
In a corner of your own
And maybe then, you'll surely see
Why were all alone

A simple hesitation before you climb any higher
In these lines the contradictions In the search for desire